Sieviete

Exuding passion

Chasing her goals and dreams

Independence gained

Never giving up

Ever resilient she is

Doing what she loves

 

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Unexpressed Feelings

Suppressed hurt, surreptitious yearning

Aching that seems to have no end

Pain that slowly breaks me down

A throbbing heart that only craves for your love

 

Longing that was never fulfilled

Pining to all those should and could have been’s

A wandering soul, an ungranted wish

Desiring the only one that can’t just be reached

 

Contained emotions, unexpressed feelings

Things that words can’t explain

Secrets kept, desires veiled

Concealment that’s too hard to bear

 

Days spent on wishful thinking

Daydreams that sends one to bliss

The heart that craves for what it couldn’t have

A furtive desire that has to stop

 

 

Inconsistencies

When you smiled at me as we cross each other’s path

All the hurt and pain I’ve concealed resurfaced and materialized

The longing I’ve felt for quite so long

Stabbed and pierced through me like a double edged sword

 

If only I could shed the tears that has been kept for long

I’d probably broke down and let everything go

All the pent up pain, hurt and shame

Even the unconfessed feelings that I always try to conceal

 

As I go on every single day with you buried at the back of my mind

Taking one step at a time

Making myself believe that someday all these nonsense will go away

Thinking encouraging thoughts and aspirations I’ve dreamt

 

I recalled a time when I was deeply hurt

Crushed with jealousy when I saw you with her

Shared with that girl the laughter you used to have with me

And everything we had when we’ve been together

 

I told myself you used to smile at me that way

But even that only remains a wishful thinking

I’m almost full of hope that I’ll get over you somehow

Discard all these vile feelings which haunts me down

Regardlessly You

Burying it all in the past

Unconfessed feelings, useless rants

Never going back to those melancholic nights

Tears falling endlessly from those weary eyes

 

 

Time will come when it’ll end

Hurt by conversations unintentionally listened

Stabbed with jealousy seeing you with them

I’ll get over it, just stop making me feel so happy and at bliss

 

 

And I thought I’ll get the courage

To write something which does not involve you in it

Guess I was wrong to ever thought its possible

Because until now it’s you who inspires everything that I can think of

 

 

When they say that your strength is also your weakness

I laughed at the absurdity of the idea

But when you came and suddenly walked away

I realize that they were telling me a huge painful reality

 

 

To stop thinking and talking about these things

Is something I wanted for myself a long time ago already

But how can I tell my heart that it is already too much

That I just have to let it go and be apathetic to that someone

The need of being needed

That need of being needed by somebody whom you knew is capable of taking care of themselves

That it is only because of your stubborn heart that wants to become a part of their life and be sought after by them as well that you become too attached to them.

That you make yourself suffer by not letting them know that they mean so much more they became a detrimental part of your daily life

That you are in pain because their simple gestures and attentions means the world to you

 

That you assume they need you when in fact you need them more than they need you

That they’re the last person you expect not to tell you excatly what’s wrong with you

That eventhough you know they’re tired of putting up to you, you’re assured that they’ll never get tired of correcting you

That even if you can’t say what you want to say, they will let you know immediately if there’s a problem upfront

 

That you won’t ever think they’ll make sarcastic remarks towards you

That you won’t ever hear comments that spits venom and hurt

That because they know that you know that they’re always frank about their thoughts

That even though it will hurt you know they will say everything to you because they should have known that you need it more than they do

 

Drowned

Maybe you did find out that it was you
The inspiration in all the things that I do
The one who made my heart beat so fast
The only one who got to me when others were not able to

Next time when somebody walks in my life
And shows me with the same attention that you gave
I won’t let this heart of mine fall so deep
Because that someone will eventually leave like you did

It’s hard knowing that it didn’t last
It gave me hope that probably this might be my chance
I just never thought that it has to end as well
Like everything in my life that came

Accepting that it will never change
Knowing that I’ll never have you again
Deep breaths that I’ve been doing for quite some time
Calming the heart that cries for what we had

And now as I plug the earphones in my ears
Turning up the volume of the music I’ve been listening
Drowning the thoughts that invade my mind
Hoping it wil make me forget the emotions that I have to fight